Guidelines for the celebration of Marriage
Immaculate Conception Catholic Church
Arnold, Missouri

Congratulations on your engagement!  Marriage has been blessed by God from the beginning of creation; Christian marriage symbolizes the union of Jesus Christ and His Church.  To prepare well for the celebration of this Sacrament please observe our guidelines:

Scheduling

To allow sufficient time for marriage preparation, six months advance notice must be given. Weddings may only be scheduled by one of the parish priests.

Weddings may be held on Friday evenings, beginning no earlier than 4:00 PM and no later than 7:00 PM, or on Saturdays, beginning no earlier than 10:00 AM and no later than 2:00 PM.  Ordinarily weddings are not celebrated during Advent and Lent.

Rehearsals are usually held on the Thursday or Friday prior to the wedding; please allow one hour for the rehearsal.

The celebrant of the wedding

      If you have asked a priest from another parish to celebrate your wedding, we require a letter from the priest stating that he will assume all responsibility for your marriage preparation and will celebrate your wedding.  This letter must be received before we will reserve the church for your wedding. In addition, he must be delegated in writing by the Pastor of Immaculate Conception Parish.

Preparation

      The preparation for marriage consists of three elements.

1.      The Pre-Nuptial Investigation is filled out with you by the priest or deacon early in the preparation process.  To complete this form, you will need a baptismal certificate issued within six months of the wedding date. If either party was married before, either a Church decree of nullity of the previous marriage, or the death certificate of the former spouse, is required.

 

2.      The FOCCUS, a series of statements about marriage and related issues. This inventory will affirm the strengths of your relationship as well as point out areas for further discussion. After completing this inventory you will meet with the priest or deacon to discuss it.

 

3.      The Marriage Preparation Program.  You may choose the Archdiocesan Marriage Preparation classes [314-792-7182], the Engaged Encounter weekend [www.geocities.com.stlcee], the Marriage Preparation Retreat sponsored by St. Francis Xavier Church [314-977-7318], or the individual preparation program held at our parish.

 

      In addition, a sacramental Confession and reception of Holy Communion is expected for Catholics. 

Planning the wedding service

      The priest or deacon will provide a booklet containing options for the Scripture readings and prayers to be used for the wedding ceremony.

      Ordinarily a wedding of two Catholics includes the celebration of Mass.  When one party is not Catholic, the wedding is usually a Liturgy of the Word.  If the couple requests it, Mass may be celebrated, although Holy Communion is given only to Catholics.

       If either party is not baptized, the wedding will be a Liturgy of the Word; the Mass may not be celebrated.

The wedding Coordinator

      To assist you with various preparations for the wedding ceremony, please contact one of our parish wedding coordinators: Michelle Wolk 636-282-0580 or Patricia Hupfeld 636-282-2082.

The wedding party

      Two witnesses are required for a Catholic wedding.  Liturgical ministers (readers of the Scriptures and prayer of the faithful, altar servers, presenters of the bread and wine, extraordinary ministers of Holy Communion) may be requested from the parish or chosen from family or friends.  Scripture readers and ministers of Holy Communion must be qualified to serve at the liturgy.

      The “unity candle” is not required for a Catholic wedding; it is entirely optional.

        Normally children younger than 5 years of age should not be in the wedding procession; any exception must be approved by the priest or deacon celebrant of the wedding.

Music

      Appropriate music and song is essential for the wedding liturgy.  Catholic worship services expect the participation of the congregation; solo songs may not be substituted for the congregation’s prayer (for example, the response to the readings, the Lord’s Prayer).

      Please contact one of our parish musicians: Etta Werkmeister [636-296-3773], Monica Bizelli [cell: 314-448-8590; home: 314-892-8448], Beth Ziegler (314-603-0451) and Gabe Wolk (636-282-0580).  They are listed in order of seniority and experience.  Other musicians may not perform without prior approval. Parish singers/cantors are:  Sue Barbagallo (636-464-4932) and Monica Bizelli (cell: 314-448-8590; home: 314-392-8448).

Photography & video

      We ask photographers to respect the liturgical celebration by not entering the altar area during the service; they should also take care not to distract the congregation or interfere with the liturgical ministers (for example, they may not take flash pictures of the Scripture readers while they are reading).

      Our church is a sacred place of worship, not a studio. A few posed pictures in the church may be taken after the wedding, up to 20 minutes after the service. Alternatively, pictures may be taken before the wedding, but no pictures may be taken later than 30 minutes before the wedding liturgy. In the case of a Saturday afternoon wedding, all photography must end by 3:30 PM.  Inappropriate arrangements for pictures (e.g. sitting on the altar steps) is strictly prohibited.

Decorations

      Tasteful floral arrangements of real flowers - not silk or artificial of any kind - are strongly encouraged for a wedding ceremony. Note: It is customary to leave the flower arrangements at the Church after the wedding not only as a courtesy to the parish, but also because there is usually not time to rearrange things prior to the Saturday evening Mass. If you wish, you may return on Monday, after the Sunday Masses are over, to pick up your floral arrangements.

 

      You may place decorations on the ends of the pews; however these may not be attached using tacks, tape or anything that would damage the finish of the wood. Your florist may have helpful ideas that are acceptable.  For safety reasons, setting up stands for candles in the aisles is strictly forbidden.

Aisle runners no longer serve any practical purpose, and for the sake of the bridal party’s and guests’ safety, are not to be used.

 

      Throwing of rice, birdseed, flower petals, etc. is not permitted inside or outside of the Church, because it can be hazardous to the health and safety of our environment and also presents a clean-up problem. For obvious fire safety reasons sparklers are not permitted.  Balloon release is strictly forbidden for environmental reasons. 

Legal requirements

      A civil marriage license, valid in the State of Missouri, is required and should be given to the priest or deacon on the day of the rehearsal.

Alcohol

      Any member of the wedding party using alcohol anywhere on the parish grounds prior to the wedding, or who is inebriated, will not be permitted to take part in the wedding service. This will be enforced strictly. 

Schedule of Fees

      Immaculate Conception Church has been built and maintained by the generosity of its parishioners.  We do not offer our church for use by anyone not meeting one of the following conditions:

·         A registered parishioner

·         A Catholic living within our Parish boundaries

·         The child or grandchild of a parishioner. 

 

We require the following fees from registered active parishioners.

·         Fee for use of Church                          $250.00

·         Fee for Wedding Coordinator              $50.00

·         Fee for Brides Changing Room            $25.00

·         Priest Stipend                                       $100.00

 

      An optional Changing Room for the Groom will cost an additional $25.00. 

 

      Non-parish members will be charged a fee of $350.00 for the use of the Church.  Anyone living within the parish boundaries but not registered, or registered but with no record of regular

contributions prior to their initiating the marriage preparation program, may be charged the Non-parish member fee.  All other fees remain the same.

 

      Our musicians set their own fees; please contact them for information.

 

After you have set your date with the priest contact Greg Wise, Business Manager, at icbvm@icarnold.org or call at 636-321-0002, ext. 12 to obtain a wedding contract. 

 

We ask that as a courtesy to your fellow parishioners that you leave our parish facilities in the same condition as when you arrived. It is expected that you designate someone in your party to ensure proper clean up of the Church, and any other rooms that were used, of tissues, flowers, boxes, programs, etc.

 Please note that none of the church furnishings may be moved for the wedding.

 If you plan to live in Immaculate Conception Parish after your marriage, please contact one of the parish secretaries, so that you can be registered as a new family. Please do not presume that a previous registration will accurately indicate your status as a newly married couple.